Kissed by your love.!

I am a man whose friends are few

neither chased the rains nor the mountain dew,

So many seasons faded without a rainbow

Until the autumn brought me to you.

The world looks better wrapped in your smile

Which is reflected in your infinite eyes, 

With you its the same solace every now and while

Truly love is oblivious to how the time flies.

The velvet of wine on your lips

Draws me like a dew drop on parched leaves,

Slumbering on your chest and dwelling in your thoughts

With pangs of passion untold, I fall and heave.

Come make my people your own

With their affection and their frown,

Touch their lives so they rejoice

Like a child enjoying a clown.

Relish a feast on my sorrows

Roam around my aisles of melancholy,

Come help me shred my fears

Discover my dark chasm fondly.

Silence my demons with your giggles

Embrace my chaos or expose my dirt,

Shape our future around your freckles

I fear no inferno as I have been burnt.

Should you find me down & shorn of my will,

And find my struggles on your life donned,

Spend your best sunset on me but waive the bill,

For our time together and beyond.

Without you I get mechanical & keep to my own

Devoid of us I will stumble like a ghost alone,

With you time stands still & moments behold,

Ours is a story to be cherished and retold.

Ours is not a love of thrill,

Stronger than a bond of whisper and hiss,

It is intentional not incidental

won’t fade like the warmth of a dying kiss.

From Californian sun to shanghai nights 

From Taipei sorrows to Sydney lights,

We made some memories & lived many more

Without you even the sweetest honey will turn sour.

Riches of the world means nothing without you

Warmth of my arms will never turn blue,

Make merry in your absence, Ah not a clue

The sole marker of my existence is you.

I know I am kissed by your love

Have became the moth to your flame, 

From this day onwards

You are bound forever to my name.

May you stare never into the empty wilderness,

And your anguish dissolve into my tears,

I wish to breathe my last in shade of your hair,

I wish to wear your smell as my last layer.

Dig my heart and find the mirth

You are my full moon and my rising sun,

Oh Darling! Dig deep and find yourself 

That’s the heaven I know, I prowl for other none.

The poet and the storm

People accuse me of being a poet,
But they will never figure out that you are the poem I love.

People think I am rich,
Oh! They have never seen the silver of moon glitter on your lips.

People fight over the shape of the globe,
And I am terribly lost in the loops of your hair.

People fantasize the spring of lilac,
For they have never seen you blossom in my arms.

People say I sleep too much these days,
I am hypnotized by your smell in pleats of my bed sheet where you once slept.

People say your beauty is a race against time,
But time will register your footprints sprinkled with my words.

People shelter themselves from the cold breeze,
All I want is to be touched by same whiff of air that touched you.

People explore outside to find bliss,
And I am trapped in a world inside me that is rippled only by your laugh.

People talk about inferno of the hell,
The fools can't feel my burning desires of you.

People have a chapter that they won't read aloud,
And I have your name to silence my demons.

People breathe through time without being alive,
And all I desire is a moment of love with you.

People want to guess what I can offer you,
Only you can find out if you let my affection resonate in you.

People say you will never reciprocate,
Well don't for I am learning to enjoy your silence.

People ask me to tread softly with love,
But my destruction would be legendary if you are my storm.

People say you will leave me blue,
I will then re-live my memories as my heart longs only for you.

Divergent

                                                         

You don't deserve to be loved by anyone.
You must disown your own confidence that makes people timid. Your smile is a slap on the face of the civilization that can't see through it. Your brisk walk exudes authority that the world will not acknowledge. Your attire speaks volumes about how you have failed to keep pace with the accepted trends of modern era. Your desires are sprinkled with elements beyond the imagination.

The social dictum revolves around feminism but you are an aberration among the fair sex. You make other women feel inferior as you have nothing in common with them. They see the amazon in you.

You are certainly the descendant of devil for they have seen no angels like you. You are an agent of chaos bound to destroy the established order. Your life will be colorless as the world can't find a canvas to paint an anomaly like you.

You make evident everything that is wrong with this world. You should be locked within the four walls because the human species has no taste for a character such as yourself.  Your ideas should be ripped as they profess what is right. You will die in solitude as there exists no match for you.

Nobody can teach you because none has any idea about what you want. Nobody can take pleasure in your existence for you exist on your own. You are something the world will never be. Time should  retain only the best it can offer and there is no place for the divergent.

You are doomed and your waltz through the world be watched. You will be done and dusted soon.
Save yourself while you can.

manifestations of mind..!!

Beautiful women do induce irrationality in men. I knew this in fact but not in form until she happened. She is a woman of substance with her own footprints of errors and wisdom. She can be an ambassador of fantasy but let's say she has rounded off her aura with rigid principles and self imposed restrictions.
Many a times I thought of approaching her with a scandalous proposal but she may read my smile rather deeply..
There is something about intelligent women that brings them in my zone of attention and more I observe them with a sense of appreciation stronger goes my propensity to flirt..
I do check myself in time but once in a while you come across a woman who blows your psyche to a level that all your covers of pretensions prove nothing but a hindrance in your imagination. She inculcates in you that feeling of "fight for me" and inspires confidence of occasional dalliance..
I have to be at my convincing best to sway her to even consider that I am not into just her pants
A breach of trust may ruin the equation big time but the flip side has a silver lining..
There is so much more than meets the eye but time has clipped wings of efforts. Possibilities are immense yet apprehensions are ripe.
We both have outrun the main stretch of our lives and ain't willing to taste the same wine again..
Time is sour where she expects sparks to fly soon without rushing to make things happen. Oxymoronic situation at it's very best..
Riding on your instincts you decides to take your chances and this one act of dare has the potential to redefine your life..
I am quite certain that there is more to love than natural law of procreation. I wish to spend a lot to time exploring all facets of her fragility and strength. Wish she knew I longed for her touch and cared to feel her tender lips on mine. I wish it does not sound cheap in her head. Our lives stand on cusp of diversion and it beats the normal course of affairs if we were to introduce an elemental fusion of body and soul.
Why can't we start with a carnal push and stick together. Let's not  be so rigid about life, rules and society. (I wonder if Society has ever bothered humans in bed..haha)
Here I stand contemplating whether to give it a shot or ignore it as a ripple in the cup..
It seems I won't get to know unless I keep my imperative arguments aside and be the guy I once was who used to enjoy living dangerously..
Life can be a song only if she reciprocates and match fire for fire..!!

Connect the dots..!!

How often it happens that all stories you spin, every word you draft, every whim and fancy you throw,
draws you closer; bit by bit to the unenvitable, Irrevocable and dire certainity of your life?
And here I stand holding that certainity in my soul, spilling emotions in my body and over riding my rationality with a pseudo logic of its own.

I feel as if I am radiating clues in the air. Clues I wish could find their way to you; to seap inside and express
themselves in their own language (god, I still dwell in fairy tales).

What is a man willing to put at stake when the odds of his wishful survival are compromised?
The most he can do is to put himself for the toss and gamble it to the end, in hope of a desired singularity.

What is that singularity going to be? Certainly not your approval as I wish but disdain, obsessive compulsion and may be unrequited love. ( Don't worry, I am too strong for all that crap).

But that's not the point. The point is to live by the human code of conduct that reads 'Be true to yourself'.
And I know it would be totally unfair and daunting prospect not to abide by it.

The truth is that I (in whole, with every chunk of flesh that quantifies as me, with every super celestial particle
that subsides as my soul, with every rational irrational thought that had, has or will reflect my choices) am immensely drawn towards you.

How will you describe a man going all out of his way, pushing himself just for the glimpse of a woman?
what phrase you can coin to circumscribe his potential for a good friend?
what keys can unlock the secrets of a man consumed by his own desires?
Perhaps nothing as the lock opens from within.
Thats precisely what i intend to do.

I am saying all this because it makes a difference to me. I am saying all this because it, more or less, has become a part of me.

We both know that there is no parameter of Reciprocation (i wish there were) so lets keep that out of equation.
You have a life and so do I. I know you have your own engagements and your own choices to make.Nothing has to change.
I demand nothing. I don't seek redemption. (I ain't made that way). All i wanted was to express myself.

Hope you understand the true context of this piece of information and conduct yourself gracefully in the shade of any future events.

Perhaps you don't want to entertain such text but i assure you that i will never intrude into your life.
If you think i already did, then let me assure you that you will never see me getting vocal riding on the constitutional freedom of speech & expression again.
Please feel free to express yourself.
Maybe the forum is not apt, but my intentions certainly are.!!

And you say..!!

I never call you every time I feel lonely.

Because I am afraid you will sense it in my voice.

You say I don’t talk about us.

Oh yes I don’t because it will only make me miss you more.

You say I don’t have time for us.

I wish to tell you how wrong you are because I never want to inform myself how much I love you.

You say I am drifting away from you.

No honey, I am just trying to keep myself not being obsessed with you all the time.

You complain I never write to you.

How can I when I have continuously failed to derive the combination of alphabets to pour my heart out.

You mock that I think more and live less.

Think again, because some people live a lifetime in a moment.

You say I spend more time with my friends.

Sweetie, I make futile attempts to tell myself that I have life beyond you.

You say I am awfully lost.

Perhaps I should be when I can’t even tell myself that we will be together tomorrow.

You blame me for my rudeness.

Check the physical distance between us and tell me I am the only one distance is playing on.

You say I flirt less off lately.

Well chemistry flows perfectly into biology more over a shorter distance.

You accuse me of trying here and there.

God I don’t know whose putting ideas into your head.

You ask me how am I?

Lured by illusion of your physical presence and tortured by the absence.

You say you miss me sometimes.

Sometimes has changed into most of the times for me.

You ask me to go out and breathe fresh.

I love my room. It’s the place where your scent grows on me.

You say I start arguments all the time.

All I care is you exercising your rights on me.

You are pissed because I am not studying.

Trying leaving my mind for a sec. Let me feel blank for a change.

You say I try to find my way with words.

Life has become a statement of justification love.

Accept mine forever and change it.

You say you want to live-in.

Well how about being my first summer morning every night.

You say I have no social life.

Don’t you know I am used to your presence on my shoulder in a movie hall.

You say I am not eating well and loosing strength.

I wish you were here to measure every ounce I have lost. Surprisingly it won’t affect my performance. So I disagree.

You say you appreciate civilization.

Eh, you make love like savages. But I like your idea of civilization.

I am definitely not the one who will dislike fertilizing a civilization.

You say you love kids.

I will father them first. Your motto should be saving your personal fortune of my manhood.

You say you want to go for a world trip.

Oh finally we found something to agree upon.

You say I should push myself together.

Zingadi na jaane chal rhi h ya maut ka intzaar kar rhi h.

Sang beh sako toh beh chalo, ek pal thehar sako toh thehar chalo.

Jaana hai humhe kshitijh ke par, sang udd sako toh udd chalo.

Manzil na ban sake toh ghum nahin, kam se kam humrahi toh ban chalo...

Bipolar Love Syndrome

In an era where love and fuck dominate the young minds I am pleased to say that I am quite young to have experienced all shades of emotions in my life.

Is it an exaggerated truth or a pompous lie? I could not have answered myself had it not been about somebody’s life and then I realized that I was asking the wrong question.

I aimed for a course correction and here I stand grappled by the love paradox. Is love for real? If yes then what is this so called super hyped phenomenon that every dick and harry is boasting about.

Frap pant yet pejorative is the situation and I hope to witness no dawn. I always saved myself the trouble of getting into the chaotic situation of resolution but seem it‘s time I face it by the horns and shed my cloak of imperviousness.

 I used to believe there are two kinds of people, those who experience love and those who want love.  As I am not a staunch follower of non alignment, I will firmly place myself in the second category. I thought I knew what this love is but then I realized how obsessed I was. Obsessed with myself (not to mention I love the story of echo and narcissus). But then evolved a third kind of species related to love in form of a unique equation. I am talking about people who are confused. Confusion is by default the coliseum of morons like me who battle all their lives just to beat the purpose of obvious.  Obvious is nothing but the feeling of happiness. Love comes in many forms but there is one thing that it always unfolds in your lap, the prospect of happiness. If you are not happy you are definitely not in love.

Love is an emotion of need and self. Need to keep self happy and in the pursuit of that happiness we tend to make others happy. An animal does not respond to your love but out of an emotion that tends to make him feel connected and happy. Be it anything that I have desired, I have desired it for myself. It’s not that I have anything against your happiness but I desire that happiness with me. I want to see us happy together. That is how it should be.

Had I been a gal I would have been very emotional. I had to be because of the weight on my chest but I am not a gal and I am not emotional. How often I hear such arguments and I wonder what it really means? Either people associate emotions only with gals or they have a special liking for playing male chauvinist. I am neither of the two and I am still waiting for someone to come up with a device to measure emotions to fill in their big mouth.

Love is not a protocol that you can dictate. It’s more of a situation that often happens. The big plus is that people like being in this situation for some time and when it starts getting monotonous they tend to shake themselves off. Folks fancy their ideas of carnal love (you can’t mix up here, trust me) and sometimes their own obsession which demands tutelage of their mate results in the doom. More often people submit and hit the docks hard but that’s how things move in this world and I see nothing wrong in that. After all, love is biological. The feeling is serene not because of the released oxytocin rather it fulfills something running in your head most of the times.

This is no equivocal text written to sweep some people off their feet or to divulge some new theme of the main stream cinema but only to hit some thinking brains and ignite a little spark of the practicality. It’s not easy to see your near and dear ones suffering because of this bipolar love syndrome but then you can’t preach all the time. It’s high time that people should really understand what it means to move on. It means forgive and forget. If you can’t forget you can’t forgive and if you can’t forgive peace will elude you all your life. Why drag baggage from your past? You have the whole wide world open to you, full of new opportunities and exuberant souls. Love (whatever that means) will only come to you if you are open to welcome it. And if you think you are very tuff then pretend nothing is wrong in this world and you can survive anything. In words of Richa ‘you don’t have to appear sad even if you are doomed’. Learn the lesson that nothing stays forever. Things that don’t change often fall before the autumn. Modify your code and switch to the one that has some variable you can change anytime because you never know what you thought will stick is vanished in the gloom of this world. It’s your shadow that disappears in the dark first.

Everything will be fine only if you have the balls to decide your own fate. Nobody will comfort you all time so better cut this shit off and stop this rona dhona. Nobody dies without anybody and if you can’t make your life worth living, make sure you at least survive it. I don’t want to live cribbing about something I don’t have and I have the courage to accept that now I have to manage without it.

I am not against relationships as I have seen people grow in somebody’s shade. It’s just I have realized that some people are not made for relationships and I can see where I am grounded.